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  1. 01-19-2006 05:52 PM #151
    Big Johnny69
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    Chuck Norris trims his beard with Ginsu knives.
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  2. 01-19-2006 05:56 PM #152
    Golfpeasant
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    People are actually immortal. We only die when Chuck Norris decides "its our time".
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  3. 01-19-2006 06:12 PM #153
    Big Johnny69
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    Chuck Norris isn't allowed to eat with utensils when he goes out for dinner, he could use a spoon as a weapon to kill somebody. But he could still kill somebody with his hands or feet, but this is the least painful way to die.
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  4. 01-21-2006 06:14 PM #154
    wahz
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    When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
    Chuck Norris does not sleep with men because he is gay. Rather, he has run out of women. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
    Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living s**t out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited.
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  5. 01-29-2006 12:06 AM #155
    Big Johnny69
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    Chuck Norris can coach the Toronto Maple Leafs to a win!
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  6. 01-29-2006 12:16 AM #156
    jonf
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    Quote Originally Posted by Geoff Johnston
    Chuck Norris can coach the Toronto Maple Leafs to a win!
    COMIC GENIUS
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  7. 02-01-2006 01:14 PM #157
    g8r
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    Quote Originally Posted by Geoff Johnston
    Chuck Norris can coach the Toronto Maple Leafs to a win!
    Only because he would threaten the other team with a Roundhouse Kick and they would score on themselves.
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  8. 02-01-2006 01:17 PM #158
    Big Johnny69
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    Quote Originally Posted by g8r
    Only because he would threaten the other team with a Roundhouse Kick and they would score on themselves.
    I think moreso that the Leafs would fear getting a roundhouse kick themselves if they didn't win so they would play their hearts out and win. Although this is them playing the London Knights junior team. Nudge, nudge Golfbum!
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  9. 02-03-2006 04:19 PM #159
    dH
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    I've been ignoring htis thread for days now always like why is that post so popular. I now know why. that site is hilarious!!!
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  10. 02-03-2006 04:23 PM #160
    dH
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    Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.


    It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.


    The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

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  11. 03-13-2006 07:11 PM #161
    Big Johnny69
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    With a strategically placed roundhouse kick to my head, Chuck Norris could knock some sense into me and get me to stop hoing clubs!
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  12. 09-07-2006 08:45 AM #162
    Big Johnny69
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    Chuck Norris played a round of golf with a 12" piece of rebar, and a sun dried tomato, he shot a 54

    Saw this and figured I had to post it.
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  13. 09-07-2006 04:14 PM #163
    Pinshark
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    Quote Originally Posted by Geoff Johnston
    Chuck Norris played a round of golf with a 12" piece of rebar, and a sun dried tomato, he shot a 54

    Saw this and figured I had to post it.
    roflmao
    PinShark
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  14. 09-07-2006 04:18 PM #164
    Hacker
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    Who is Chuck Norris???
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  15. 09-07-2006 05:19 PM #165
    Big Johnny69
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hacker
    Who is Chuck Norris???
    For your sake I hope Chuck Norris doesn't see this.
    "A life lived in fear of the new and the untried is not a life lived to its fullest." M.Pare 10/09/08
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  16. 09-07-2006 05:32 PM #166
    Law
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    hahahahahha, way to go Chuck!
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  17. 09-07-2006 09:51 PM #167
    Hacker
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    OK, OK, I'll play the right way............

    Why wouldn't Chuck Norris make a good piece of Toilet Paper??

    Because Chuck don't take off of anyone!
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  18. 09-07-2006 10:47 PM #168
    Wilster
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    Quote Originally Posted by dH
    Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.


    It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.


    The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

    brilliant !
    At the end of the day ... It gets dark
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  19. 09-07-2006 11:14 PM #169
    Pinshark
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    I knew this thread still had life.

    Chuck Norris makes the Noids pizza cold.
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  20. 09-08-2006 12:11 AM #170
    Law
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    new one???

    CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
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  21. 09-08-2006 12:43 AM #171
    LobWedge
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    I'm submitting this one...

    Chuck Norris doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve. He wears some poor bas***d's brain matter on his foot.
    Last edited by LobWedge; 09-08-2006 at 01:13 PM.
    When applying the Rules, you follow them line by line. You don't read between them.
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