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Forum: Humour

Make me laugh

  1. Sticky Thread Sticky: PG rated jokes only please

    In this forum we want PG rated jokes only. If you can't tell it at the dinner table, please don't tell it here.

    Started by Kilroy‎, 11-20-2005 07:05 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 19,052
    11-20-2005 07:05 AM Go to last post
  1. Not the best directions!

    Take 60 seconds to do this, I guarantee you will show someone else, it's too funny not to. 1. go to 2. click on "maps" 3. click on "get directions" 4. type "New York" in the first box (the "from" box) 5. type "London" in the second box (the "to" box) 6. click on "get...

    Started by Big Johnny69‎, 04-19-2007 06:17 PM
    • Replies: 5
    • Views: 3,066
    04-19-2007 10:09 PM Go to last post
  2. These Guys Didn't Study

    AND MY FAV....

    Started by MusicMan‎, 04-14-2007 11:17 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 4,144
    04-15-2007 12:11 AM Go to last post
  3. Women Ass Size Study

    There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses! I thought the results were pretty interesting: 25% of women think their ass is too fat... 10% of women think their ass is too skinny... The other 65% say that they don't care; they love him, he's a good man, and...

    Started by Hacker‎, 04-13-2007 04:24 PM
    • Replies: 8
    • Views: 4,649
    04-14-2007 04:57 PM Go to last post
  4. Irony

    BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE AND PROBABLY THE CENTURY!! Charlotte , North Carolina . USA . A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against, among other things, fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars...

    Started by jeremy brown‎, 04-13-2007 01:01 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 3,582
    04-13-2007 01:48 PM Go to last post
  5. Tell Me This Won't Happen To Us.

    TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US. An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel,the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried....

    Started by MusicMan‎, 04-12-2007 11:50 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 7,298
    04-12-2007 11:50 PM Go to last post
  6. Anyone Invited To This Golf Tournament?

    I was wondering if anyone from this forum received an invitation to play in this golf tournament? I didn't, I guess the organizers knew I would be tied up watching THE SHARKS :laughing:

    Started by Golfbum‎, 04-12-2007 06:47 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,163
    04-12-2007 06:47 PM Go to last post
  7. Talking The Secret to a Long Happy Marriage

    :laughing: :laughing: The Secret to a LONG, HAPPY MARRIAGE: (as told to me.) My wife and I are going to celebrating our 50th anniversary next year. Pastor Dave asked me to take a few minutes and share some insight into how I managed to live with the same woman all these years. So I told...

    Started by LHSteve‎, 04-03-2007 04:21 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,640
    04-08-2007 09:52 AM Go to last post
  8. gotta love goalies reminds me a bit of the old Nike Goalie commercials.....

    Started by jeffc‎, 04-03-2007 12:17 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,289
    04-03-2007 12:17 PM Go to last post
  9. Beware Of Snakes


    Started by Golfbum‎, 04-03-2007 09:58 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,141
    04-03-2007 09:58 AM Go to last post
  10. Roll Up The Rim Last Chance To Win

    It would appear that the Leafs are really desperate now! :lmfao

    Started by Golfbum‎, 03-26-2007 01:57 PM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 2,962
    03-26-2007 07:58 PM Go to last post
  11. New Equipment that we all need from time to time!

    Started by Golftime‎, 03-19-2007 02:50 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 4,120
    03-19-2007 07:15 PM Go to last post
  12. Dear Abby: ...

    Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job six years ago, he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he...

    Started by TourIQ‎, 03-11-2007 03:59 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,682
    03-11-2007 03:59 PM Go to last post

    This clip is hilarious :lmfao Makes you wonder how grown ups can argue with a HUNK OF WOOD that is sitting on someone's lap :laughing: HAVE A GOOD LAUGH TODAY :-)

    Started by Golfbum‎, 03-10-2007 12:48 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,632
    03-10-2007 09:59 PM Go to last post
  14. Mom's Minivan Vs An Old Tv

    This is hillarious, well I thought it was :laughing: MOM'S MINIVAN VS AN OLD TV

    Started by Golfbum‎, 03-04-2007 01:07 PM
    • Replies: 6
    • Views: 3,090
    03-07-2007 10:22 AM Go to last post
  15. Premeditated Rage On A Golf Course

    I have never come across this type of crime scene in my 25 years of golfing :lmfao Sure, I have seen the odd broken club but nothing this devasting!

    Started by Golfbum‎, 03-03-2007 08:36 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,790
    03-03-2007 10:21 AM Go to last post
  16. Wink Talking Dog for Sale

    A guy is driving around Newfoundland and he sees a sign in front of a house: Talking Dog For Sale. He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there. You talk?" he asks.

    Started by Kiwi‎, 03-01-2007 10:26 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,180
    03-02-2007 12:15 PM Go to last post
  17. W-o-r-k Virus

    There is a virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life...

    Started by Golfbum‎, 02-20-2007 07:50 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,544
    02-20-2007 07:50 PM Go to last post
  18. George W

    A friend sent me this cartoon. Very funny.

    Started by mpare‎, 02-17-2007 07:14 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 3,015
    02-19-2007 09:32 PM Go to last post
  19. Things Hallmark Cards DON'T Say

    In Celebration of Valentine's Day yesterday (the Holiday rumoured to be created by the Greeting Card Business) I thought that I'd share some thing that you will NEVER see written on a Hallmark Card.... My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat When I looked at the tire... I noticed your...

    Started by Hacker‎, 02-15-2007 03:54 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,995
    02-16-2007 09:14 AM Go to last post
  20. Millionaire Contestant

    :lmfao :lmfao

    Started by PEI Golfing‎, 02-12-2007 11:31 PM
    • Replies: 8
    • Views: 3,652
    02-13-2007 08:11 PM Go to last post
  21. English is a Crazy Language

    Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, or meat. We take English for...

    Started by Hacker‎, 02-13-2007 02:42 PM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 2,750
    02-13-2007 04:14 PM Go to last post
  22. Hockey joke

    Sorry. Couldn't resist. A Toronto Maple Leaf fan, a Philadelphia Flyer fan, and an Ottawa Senators fan were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of beer. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi...

    Started by larry‎, 02-13-2007 03:45 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,190
    02-13-2007 03:48 PM Go to last post
  23. The Biggest 2 Letter Word

    There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is "UP." It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP ? At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we...

    Started by Hacker‎, 02-13-2007 02:45 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,248
    02-13-2007 02:49 PM Go to last post
  24. Who Said Speaking English was Easy??

    You Think English is Easy??? Can you read these right the first time? 1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 2) The farm was used to produce produce. 3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

    Started by Hacker‎, 02-13-2007 02:38 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,066
    02-13-2007 02:38 PM Go to last post
  25. Dumbest Kid In The World?

    Dumbest Kid in the World? A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you." The barber puts a dollar in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you...

    Started by Golfbum‎, 01-31-2007 01:33 PM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 3,291
    02-11-2007 10:24 PM Go to last post
  26. Wink Welfare

    Guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi, you know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job." The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who...

    Started by Kiwi‎, 02-09-2007 04:19 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,954
    02-09-2007 04:19 PM Go to last post
  27. Useless pic

    Can you recognize your wife?

    Started by Chieflongtee‎, 02-09-2007 09:14 AM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,701
    02-09-2007 03:04 PM Go to last post
  28. new book, "Winning Golf Strategies"

    Here is the Table of Contents from my new book, "Winning Golf Strategies", which I believe gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have gained through my own years of experience in the game and observations of golfing partners. I look forward to your feedback. ...

    Started by PEI Golfing‎, 02-06-2007 10:36 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,951
    02-06-2007 10:42 PM Go to last post
  29. Situations where using the "F" Word is acceptable

    Started by Hacker‎, 02-01-2007 04:33 PM
    • Replies: 17
    • Views: 5,710
    02-04-2007 09:41 PM Go to last post
  30. Sign at a hockey game you won't see on tv Wonder is she is a goalie?????

    Started by Big Johnny69‎, 02-03-2007 09:30 AM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 3,162
    02-03-2007 02:23 PM Go to last post
  31. Poems by women and men

    Woman's Poem Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed,

    Started by Big Johnny69‎, 02-03-2007 09:09 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,060
    02-03-2007 09:09 AM Go to last post
  32. This Is What Is All Comes Down To In The End

    One of my buddies at work also decided to retire and join me on the golf course (Told me he could not play 7 days a week :scratchch ) He found this and forwarded to me. Sad, but this is what it all comes down to when you retire. :laughing: :laughing:

    Started by Golfbum‎, 01-30-2007 10:17 AM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 1,922
    02-01-2007 11:20 PM Go to last post
  33. annoying passanger next to you?

    The next time you're on a plane, train or bus where you have an annoying passenger sitting next to you, follow these steps. 1. remove your laptop from its case 2. switch it on 3. make sure the annoying passenger can see the screen 4. go to this link: ...

    Started by MusicMan‎, 01-23-2007 09:57 PM
    • Replies: 13
    • Views: 4,909
    02-01-2007 11:18 PM Go to last post
  34. How to punk a telemarketer

    I think this might be from the Bob and Tom show, but I can't be sure. This may be the funniest thing I've ever heard.

    Started by LobWedge‎, 01-25-2007 06:20 PM
    • Replies: 9
    • Views: 4,208
    01-29-2007 01:33 PM Go to last post
  35. Duck is ALIVE!

    Came across this article and thought I would share

    Started by Pinshark‎, 01-26-2007 09:49 AM
    • Replies: 5
    • Views: 2,729
    01-26-2007 01:43 PM Go to last post
  36. Terrible picture of F1 accident !

    Ok, until you click you may wonder why this in Humour ....

    Started by lms‎, 01-25-2007 10:19 PM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 4,677
    01-26-2007 11:05 AM Go to last post
  37. Duck Hunters

    This might bring a smile to your face on TGIF :)

    Started by Golfbum‎, 01-26-2007 08:07 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,926
    01-26-2007 08:07 AM Go to last post
  38. Cool Men Have Better Friends

    Men have better Friends Friendship between Women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next day, she told her husband she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew about it. Friendship between Men: A man didn't come home one night....

    Started by Kiwi‎, 01-25-2007 09:58 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,958
    01-25-2007 09:58 PM Go to last post
  39. Outtake of a Tiger Ad

    Started by Big Johnny69‎, 01-25-2007 04:14 PM
    • Replies: 9
    • Views: 3,167
    01-25-2007 06:23 PM Go to last post
  40. women drivers Is this real????

    Started by "Richard"‎, 01-23-2007 07:44 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,375
    01-23-2007 08:29 PM Go to last post
  41. Cowboy

    An old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos,...

    Started by Chieflongtee‎, 01-22-2007 04:53 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,909
    01-22-2007 04:53 PM Go to last post
  42. The Compliment

    The Compliment: A woman, standing nude, looks in the bedroom mirror and says to her husband, "I feel horrible, I look fat and ugly. Pay me a compliment." The husband replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

    Started by Kiwi‎, 01-21-2007 12:04 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,829
    01-21-2007 12:04 AM Go to last post
  43. Quick Thinking

    The room was full of pregnant women, with their partners. The Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, and was telling the men how to give the necessary assurances to their partners at this stage of the pregnancy. She said: "Ladies:...

    Started by The Saint‎, 01-17-2007 11:03 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,246
    01-17-2007 11:03 AM Go to last post
  44. Think Before You Speak!

    OLDIES BUT CLASSICS! Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - The last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did.... FIRST...

    Started by Golfbum‎, 01-13-2007 01:20 PM
    • Replies: 4
    • Views: 2,184
    01-13-2007 05:54 PM Go to last post
  45. Tech Support 1.0

    Here is the reason I sleep on the couch 'occasionally'. A recent letter on mine to Tech Support asking to fix a problem of mine :-) Dear Tech Support: A few years back I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that...

    Started by Indio‎, 01-11-2007 03:52 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,395
    01-12-2007 06:45 PM Go to last post
  46. Wink Newfoundland Baby

    A Newfoundlander is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. When the call ends, he orders drinks for everybody in the bar because, he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Newfoundland baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can...

    Started by Kiwi‎, 01-12-2007 06:31 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,197
    01-12-2007 06:31 PM Go to last post
  47. Wink 0 to 200

    A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. ...

    Started by Kiwi‎, 01-11-2007 10:35 PM
    • Replies: 3
    • Views: 2,121
    01-12-2007 10:05 AM Go to last post
  48. Wink Family Humour

    Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the...

    Started by Kiwi‎, 01-12-2007 09:53 AM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 2,249
    01-12-2007 09:53 AM Go to last post
  49. Hinterland - Spiders On Drugs

    Started by lms‎, 01-04-2007 01:45 PM
    • Replies: 1
    • Views: 2,445
    01-08-2007 10:11 AM Go to last post
  50. Smart Ass Answers!

    The 6 Best Smart Ass Answers Of 2006 SMART ASS ANSWER #6 It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied. SMART ASS ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was...

    Started by Big Johnny69‎, 01-06-2007 05:31 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 2,561
    01-06-2007 08:38 PM Go to last post

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