A Scotsman was shipwrecked and finally washed ashore on a small island.
As he regains consciousness on the beach he sees a beautiful unclad nymphet standing over him. She asks, "Would you like some food?"
The Scot hoarsely croaks, "Och, lassie, I havna' ittin a bite in a week noo, and I am verra hungry!"
She disappears into the woods and quickly comes back with a heaping helping of haggis.(A Scottish delicacy about which the less said, the better.) When he has choked it down, she asks, "Would you like something to drink?"
"Och, aye! That haggis has made me verra thirsty and I wad verra much like a drink!"
She goes off into the woods again and returns with a bottle of 75 year old single-malt Scotch whiskey! The Scotsman is beginning to think that he's in heaven when the unclad nymphet leans closer and says, "Would you like to play around?"
"Och, lassie, don't tell me ye've got a golf course here too!"