a few too many?

[MusicMan]

One Star Hangover (*):
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively well; however, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak & fries.

Two Star Hangover (**):
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the fruity pancake from the 3:00 AM Waffle House excursion. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***):
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet Coke --- yet you haven't peed once.

Four Star Hangover ():
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five s you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover (*):
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits in the next cube. Vodka vapor is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy. In fact, you are probably still drunk. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare 'floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'floater' seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your ass. Death sounds pretty good about right now!

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Indubitably
Innovative
Preliminary
Proliferation
Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Specificity
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder
Loquacious Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
Nope, no more booze for me.
Sorry, but you're not really my type.
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight.
Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

[John]

Number four sounds about right.

[MusicMan]

been to number 4 plenty... only been to 5 once... thank god

[hoolio]

Currently in #4 mode... hoping this doesn't take a left past cuba and gain enough strength to become a Category 5.

[Sakuraba]

I didn't see the 6 star hangover listed. Those are the ones where physical motion is not possible, forget about making it to work.

[Kilroy]

Or 7. When you wake up cold and wet outdoors somewhere, with no idea where you are, how you got there, how to make your legs work or how to stop that awful noise.

[Sakuraba]

Do I hear an 8? Wake up in hospital? morgue?

[jonf]

currently somewhere in between 3 and 4. Would have been a whole lot worse if it wasn't for that 2 am Shawarma. Really looking forward to christmas shopping this afternoon...that will probably bump it up to a full on 4

[Hacker]

Do I hear an 8? Wake up in hospital? morgue?

I'm no doctor, but waking up in the morgue CAN'T be a good thing.....

[hoolio]

Do I hear an 8? Wake up in hospital? morgue?

Waking up with only one Kidney, when you started the night with 2 would be something you could add to that list.

Or how about waking up on cargo ship, destined for Germany, wearing only a bathrobe from the Hilton you were staying at.

[Hacker]

*Mental Note* - Do NOT go out drinking with Hoolio or starvingstudent

[MusicMan]

"if its worth doing... its worth over doing" dunno who said it, but i would subsribe to his newsletter

[jbrace]

Or 7. When you wake up cold and wet outdoors somewhere, with no idea where you are, how you got there, how to make your legs work or how to stop that awful noise.

True Story...

I once woke up underneath a bench in a Budapest subway station. It was mid-December and I was freezing cold, yet my head was drenched with sweat (or something). My last memory was pounding a pint of Guinness with Liam Neeson who just happended to be in Budapest as well shooting a movie and went to the pub with all intentions of having a quite night with his wife and inviting him to stop by my place for a pint the next time he was "passing through" Kingston . I remember on the ride back to the hotel, literally wishing I were dead. I mean, if someone were to have handed me a loaded gun I would have blown my own head off to end the suffering.

[fundonny]

Worst one ever, probably the number 6, was on homemade wine. Six or seven bottles of that stuff on your own will KILL YOU!

Anyone else never get hung over until they hit 30?