Forum: Humour

Wonder what Phil was thinking? :noddin :noddin

Ha Ha...

Better take note guys................... :laughing:

Custody Battle Ruling: A seven year old boy from Toronto was at the centre of a courtroom drama in an Ontario Superior Courthouse this morning when he challenged a court ruling over who should have legal custody of the juvenile. The boy has a history of being beaten repeatedly by both...

http://www.wimp.com/bushcomedy/

45 days in jail for golf iron attack. Was the iron a Titleist? http://www.ottawasun.com/News/OttawaAndRegion/2006/06/02/1610715-sun.html

I got this one today at work and I just had to share it.... My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that "Captain...

I thought this was funny.

:laughing: Hung Chow calls into work and says, "Hey, I no come work today, I really sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work." The boss says, "You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this, I go to my wife and tell her I want sex....

When I was married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blonde. Now, we have a nice house, nice...

I wonder how long it took for him to sell his motorcycle ? :laughing: :laughing: ] $10,000 06' Suzuki GSXR 1000 Farmington, UT 84025 - Aug 7, 2006 2006 Suzuki 1000. This bike is perfect! It has 1000 miles and has had its 500 mile dealer service. (Expensive) It's been adult ridden, all...

LATE BREAKING NEWS FLASH Apparently SOUTHWOLD TOWNSHIP, home of the Green Lane Landfill will be putting in an offer to buy the Toronto Maple Leafs. Since the Township will receiving 2/3's of Toronto's GARBAGE by 2010 they might as well have all of it! :lmfao

Apparently no one has warned her about the dangers of doing what she is doing here! Check the photos out in sequence, and look closely at the last one! :lmfao

A newfie woman was in a terrible car accident and went into a deep coma. After being in the coma for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor replies,"Ma'am, you had twins!.....A boy and a girl."...

A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick...

A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. ...

Can you recognize your wife?

There's nothing to it

My Italian friend sent me the Italian Christmas Song :laughing:

Hopefully this post will be found to be primarily funny and not intended as a political comment. On the other hand, political practices are oftentimes hilarious. A friend sent me the following piece. Enjoy. ----------------- This is the best plan I have heard in a LONG time: To: the...

This commercial is both brutally funny and its ending completely unpredictable. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FzgvXdQ9vE

This really works! If you don't believe it, just try this experiment. Put your dog and your spouse in the trunk of the car for an hour. When you open the trunk, which one is really happy to see you?

OMG!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5gvsMzgprA

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started... ---------- My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming Anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 In about 3...

A little known fact.... The first testicular guard "Cup" was used in Hockey in 1874 The first helmet was used in 1974. Sooooo, it took 100 years for men to realize that the brain is also important.

sound needed... http://aclu.org/pizza/images/screen.swf :lmfao

Click on DK:lmfao DK

http://www.thevog.net/forum/off-topic-60/ot-what-not-to-do-on-a-golf-carts/

Here they are: 10> You won't go to estate auctions because they don't take PayPal. 9> Every time you go to the grocery store, you offer the cashier one cent more for each item in the cart of the person in front of you. 8> To cut costs, FedEx and UPS are considering relocating...

Read the story first, then listen http://www.thenerdgroup.com/funnyvoicemail.wav On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a...

Dear Husband; I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last...

I love these!:-) Yes, it's that magical time of the year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honouring the least Evolved among us. Here then, are the glorious winners for 2005. 1.When his 38-calibre revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach,...

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the US Attorney General said he...

The Fish Texas redneck was stopped by a game warden in East Texas recently with two ice chests of fish, leaving LakeFork well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?" "Naw, my friend, I ain't got no license. These here are...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7RMLt28n0-M Is this real????

Here is the Table of Contents from my new book, "Winning Golf Strategies", which I believe gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have gained through my own years of experience in the game and observations of golfing partners. I look forward to your feedback. ...

I saw this one and I knew it was meant for you big guy.... the hat... the breakfast drink and that boyish look...:thumbsup :thumbsup

Good gag to play on your golf buddies. http://www.theballstogoforit.com/base.cfm?utm_source=TheGolfChannel&utm_medium=banner&utm_content=E-Insult&utm_campaign=TBTGFI-fall Click on e-insults (i) Pick the insult you want D2 Kenny to read (ii) Send in your buddy's name, and D2 Kenny will...

The SKODA CAR Company is now installing GPS units in every vehicle they manufacture. :lmfao

Dog For Sale * Free to good home. * Excellent guard dog. * Owner cannot afford to feed him anymore, as there are no more thieves, murderers, or molesters left in the neighborhood for him to eat. * Most of them knew him as 'Holy ****.'

Freaking boss-In or out????????????????? http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=31983212

First-year students at Texas A&M's Vet school were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to have two...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ch9a4gzr60&NR=1

My daughter sent this on to me. Much too funny. HOW TO BE A PERFECT B..... Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement -- not even her parent's nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best Dressed mother-...

Must listen to this all the way to the end: http://maniacworld.com/selling-a-house-but-no-asians-wanted.html

Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to Toronto .. The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So...

INSTALLING SPRING... █████████████░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ 44% DONE. Install delayed....please wait. Installation failed. Please try again. 404 error: Season not found. Season "Spring" cannot be located. The season you are looking for might have been removed, had its name changed, or is temporarily...