Forum: Humour

:shake :jitter

A little imagination goes a long way. :-) http://uk.download.yahoo.com/ne/fu/attachments/buildabetterbush.htm

Turn up the volume. http://www.chezmaya.com/txt/04/sonnawabicth.htm

http://www.christmas-carols.net/carols/have-yourself-merry-little.html NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

What is the funniest reply you have ever read on this forum? For me it was a reply from a very quiet poster Gbower which went like this under the bla bla bla thread: What a vocabulary cecnat has now got. Must have gone out and hit that dream set of clubs :wave :lol2 :lol2 :lol2 ...

http://www.versteegs.com/jokes/zjlife.htmJokes about Daily Life " DEAR DIARY Aug 12 Moved to our new home in Maine. Is is so beautiful here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see them with snow covering them. I love it here. Oct 4: Maine is the most beautiful place on...

Is it cold enough for ya?

Read the story first, then listen http://www.thenerdgroup.com/funnyvoicemail.wav On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a...

A biker stops by the local Harley Shop to have his bike fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He then stopped by the feed/livestock store and...

An Irishman went home after a round of golf, his third in 3 days. He sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts" She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another...

I've had it with gas prices.

Anybody knows why Tiger is not using urinals anymore? No it is not a sex thing. Let your imagination flow and take a guess :-)

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the US Attorney General said he...

45 days in jail for golf iron attack. Was the iron a Titleist? http://www.ottawasun.com/News/OttawaAndRegion/2006/06/02/1610715-sun.html

swinging from an athletic position http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujJt3ZlN01g

> A husband and wife came for counseling after 15 years of marriage. When > asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate and painful > tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 15 years they had been > married. She went on and on and on -- neglect, lack of intimacy,...

Could it be Jeff Johnson:lmfao Thousands of golf balls stolen from driving range in odd theft BONNER SPRINGS, Kan. (AP) Ñ Nearly 4,800 fluorescent yellow golf balls are missing from a suburban Kansas City golf course after someone raided the facilityÕs driving range. Sunflower Hills Golf...

The chief's illegal putter for reading greens. (there is a level on top of it) Next move will be a laser pointer on top to check alignment:lmfao :lmfao

Woman Wins Biggest Proline Lottery In Ontario History http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_4699.aspx She picked all 13 winners to win $444,186. She does not know jack about football:lmfao

Turn up the volume and elf away:lmfao http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1256146810

Freaking boss-In or out????????????????? http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=31983212

Will the next Sens coach be named Pat???:-)

:lmfao:lmfao:lmfao

Leave my girl alone:biting::lmfao http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsGE0y82wbY

you may have seen this before but anyway: A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he...

A robber in a bank wearing a balaclava has it ripped off his head by a security guard. He points and shoots at the guard and kills him instantly. He then peruses the room and says, did anyone else see anything? an irishman standing to the side says. I tink me wife caught a glimpse of ya.:-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZS5Vz-phY8 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKgVa0YJkoo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac11mcfJDrY

One day in the future, OJ Simpson has a heart-attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. 'I don't know what to do here,' says the devil. 'You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to...

INSTALLING SPRING... █████████████░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ 44% DONE. Install delayed....please wait. Installation failed. Please try again. 404 error: Season not found. Season "Spring" cannot be located. The season you are looking for might have been removed, had its name changed, or is temporarily...

Our Father, who art in heaven hallowed be thy Name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this week our weekly rain Signed: LVM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNZnlcOOz00 :-)

Go Habs Go:-)

Golfer's dilemna: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0kdBDwNddc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWPGhEQhiIw&feature=emb_logo

When jack bauer lost his car keys, he tortured himslef for 30 minutes until he knew the exact location of the keys. Chuck Norris stole his keys and his car. Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas. The boogeyman checks his closet for Jack Bauer. Guns don't kill people, Jack Bauer kills people....

Hi all! Once I've found a stuning ad! http://hyperupload.com/download/37d0d167/clinton.wmv.html May call it "Power of african voodoo or "be careful with the exhibits". Since then I became a fan of such stuff. I surf the internet looking for short interesting commercials. You can see the...

Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to Toronto .. The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So...

Rick and Julie are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. Rick picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 'What do you think you're doing?' asks Julie 'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans he replies. 'Put them back, we can't afford them demands Julie, and so they carry on...

A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talkin Dawg Fer Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever...

A Priest and a Rabbi were sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while, the Priest turned to the Rabbi and asked, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?" The Rabbi responded, "Yes, that is still one of our laws." The Priest then asked, "Have you ever...

I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, And all the patients were out in the yard shouting, ' 13....13....13. ' The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a Little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see What was going on..... Some idiot poked me in the eye with...

On the first day, Bill sadly packed his belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, Bill had the movers come and collect his things. On the third day, he sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining-room table, by candle-light; put on some music and feasted...

for example... A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two. She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a...

Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to take a leak. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe. Law of Probability - The probability of...

A Scotsman moves to Canada and attends his first baseball game. The first batter approaches the batters' box, takes a few swings and then hits a double. Everyone is on their feet screaming "Run" The next batter hits a single. The Scotsman listens as the crowd again cheers "RUN RUN".

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Phil, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was...

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go...

These great questions and answers are from the days when Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now! Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat? A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness! (The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15...

A farmer had 5 female pigs and times were getting tough, so he went to the country fair to sell his pigs. At the fair, he came across a farmer who had 5 male pigs. After talking a bit, they decided to mate the pigs and split everything 50/50. The two farmers lived 60 miles away from each other so...

pretty funny golf match CAUTION , a couple of F bombs https://www.dkpittsburghsports.com/2019/08/10/sidney-crosby-mackinnon-bissonnette-whitney-golf-tlh/